Moving In with a Girlfriend 101
Your girlfriend has a Pinterest page. You know why? Because girls are contractually obligated by some secret society of women to have one, and if they don’t they’re not allowed to smell nice or talk to other girls anymore (educated guess, really). Do you know what girls do on Pinterest? Post pictures of the crap they want in their house. That’s all they do. It’s like a...
A conversation on my train ride
Garbled nonsense as a guy walks onto the Caltrain bike car: “bdohnz>}%jzlns” “what?” “is anyone going to SF?” “yeah, our bikes are down there” “what? where?” “down there — wait, what did you say? “do you have any crystal meth?” “oh. right. no, sorry man” “the plane! the...
Whenever I meet someone under 30 with a successful...
whilstinsf: Submission by: <CISD>
Sometimes, when a row of houses are burning, you need to figure out which houses to let burn and what fires to put out. If you try to save them all, you’ll lose the whole block.
Anyone down for a short tour?
Conversation after spending the day with my niece
Mom: “I hope Amina stays asleep…oof” CCV: “I’m surprised they don’t make baby downers to give to kids and help them go to sleep” Mom: “Maybe they expect parents to take uppers.”